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You must spend a considerable amount of time Googling exciting options for a first date, then go to the cinema anyway 7. Everything else will be greeted with disgust and extreme slagging 14. If you can get away with hanging out without having to ask, even better 6. If one person offers to pay, the other must refuse at least three times before accepting (and being secretly happy about it) 12. The only acceptable public flirting is posting funny videos on each other’s Facebook walls.Others might seem outside the box, but I've been promised they get the job done.1.Thou shalt give it time."Breakups happen for a reason. Thou shalt never be alone together."I know it sounds harsh and I guess you could break the rule after like a decade or so, but the key to staying platonic with my exes is limiting our hangouts to group activities," said Adam M., a 33-year-old lawyer in Chicago.3. Four years after their breakup, Alana, 31, was a bridesmaid in her ex-boyfriend's wedding. "My ex and I decided one of us would officially call things if one of us ever started having feelings again," said Mark, 27. Thou shalt avoid social media."I don't unfriend my exes, but I keep them off my feed," said Matt, 32, a lawyer in Washington, D. "It creates just the right amount of distance, and it gives you non-relationship things to talk about when you see each other, since you don't see their every waking minute online."8. It isn't all about NOT doing things—maintaining a friendship with an ex is just like maintaining any other friendship.So, you want to embark on a casual, no-strings attached relationship?

Thou shalt not reminisce."Live for the now, man—the happy memories will make you miss what you had, and the bad memories will just piss you off. Thou shalt not flirt."I am really good at just turning it off," said Amanda, a 24-year-old stockbroker from Brooklyn. "I remember birthdays, I check in, I always ask about their parents.

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There are some men and women whose superpowers include maintaining beyond-cordial associations with everyone they've ever seriously dated. I asked 10 of these savants to share their Ten Commandments for Staying Friends With an Ex.

Some of the rules are rational but difficult for those of us who relish the irrational after a breakup.

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